Jellicle Monologues
by jojoberry
Summary: A collection of monologues told by the Jellicle cats! An insight into the brains of the characters we all know an love, they deal with problems you may not expect. This will be updated by my level of inspiration. Skip to chapter two for more dramatic entries!
1. Demeter

**I'm warning you now, this is going to be terrible don't shoot me. This is a rant from Demy to Bomba.**

**Disclaimer: If I did own Cats (which I don't) there would be a lot more Dem and Munk!**

Bombalaurina! Why are you so in love with Tugger? Why is anybody? You're better than that oh wait...your not together anymore? Figures, you were always a flirt like that, maybe you never loved him in the first place. Maybe this was just a faze like _she _was. I still can't get that image out of my head!

Wait now you guys are back together? Facepaw! Why couldn't you chose someone nice and respectable…like Munkustrap. He's nice and kind and funny and sweet...Wait, are you serious? He likes me? Oh my Everlasting cat! How long has this been going on? Really? Oh there he is, how does my hair look? Hi Munk! Oh crap I blew it didn't I?

Why did I ever leave Macavity? Oh now I remember, because night after night of agonizingly painful…Never mind me I'm just going to have a panic attack now...What if I end up like Grizabella? I'll be a social outcast, and everyone will hate me, except Jem and Vicky, but no one ever listens to bunch of kits.

Oh crap they heard that didn't they? Now i'll have no one to invite me back into the Jellicle tribe when I am forced out by my peers...What a crazy world we live in huh? Bomba...Bomba? Wake up!

**Okay, like I said that really **_**really **_**bad. But it now its over so please leave a review, I don't care if its a smile face, I just need something in my inbox, its like crack to me. Please give me thi**


	2. Bombalaurina

**Hi guys! I wasn't originally planning to do a chapter two of this, but when your inspired your inspired! Thanks a bunch to Lunaraquafy for being my beta (Check out her stories they rock and roll!) Also thanks to: Meow Miss K and writeyourimagination for your lovely reviews!**

Its ridiculous, one minute I have to be someone and the next I have to be someone completely different. Is it so much to ask for a little routine? I have different personalities for everyone I know for Everlasting Cats sake! For Demeter I have to be caring, for the toms I need to be sexy, for the older queens I must be proper and for the kittens I've got to be a role model.

The truth is, I hate always having to be the shoulder everyone likes to lean on, I don't like to have well groomed fur all the time, I despise being straight laced and proper, and I cannot handle the pressure of having impressionable minds looking up to me. Sometimes I feel like a puppet, no cat of my own, just them with a new body and a different voice.

Everybody asks me to do so much, but they never ask what I want. They expect things and until now I thought that I had no choice, but to conform to be the perfect queen they all want. This ends now, now I am going to ask _What does Bombalaurina want? _I am going to be my own person and if they can't handle it then that's fine.

So now its time to introduce the world to the real Bombalaurina. The one who likes to stay up late and dance until dawn, the one who loves sappy-heart melting moments, the queen who cannot stand a messy den, and likes to laugh until she cries. This is the real Bombalaurina and if you don't like what you see, you can get the hell out.

**Drop me a comment below and I will defiantly PM back (unless it blocks me) and post your name on Chapter three! If you have a character you want me to write about or a suggestion for a chapter, tell me about it for Everlasting Cat's sake!**

**Keep this in mind Reviews=Good conscience=Healthy colin, so please save your colin and review my story!**


	3. Grizabella

**Sorry if this sounds a bit weird, I morphed this out of a story for a human. Its also very long for the same reason. A special thanks to **_**Meow Miss K **_**for her lovely reviews and **_**Lunaraquafy**_** as well for being my beta!**

No don't say that. You don't want to be like me. I made a reputation for myself when I was young, one that I couldn't change. I thought I was glamorous, but I was young and stupid. I craved attention and experience. Back then it was a good thing to be talked about that way. Like you were a prize to be one. Hey, you were a _prize_, you were _wanted_.

You had what everyone wanted because you were daring enough to try it. I was always the first of my friends to try everything. First one to have a tomfriend, or a kiss, then things got less innocent, I was the first to sneak out, first to become addicted, first to give myself away, and _always_ the first to fall.

After I defined my reputation, bad habits and addiction were an inevitable disaster just waiting for the right opportunity to present itself, then it was all down hill. I was too naive to see that the attention I so passionately fought to get, was not the attention I needed. I thought all attention was created equal, Everlasting was I wrong.

When I first realized I had messed up I thought kits like you were lucky. You had nothing bad on your rep, clean as a whistle. You could change if you needed to, and everyone saw you as good. You might be quiet, but you were _good. _Sure you smelled funny, but at least you were _good. _And yes your mum still tucks you in at night, but hey at least your _good._

I thought this was some dirty trick of fate, how could some people be so good, and others so bad? Is it magic that some lives are easier than others? Turns out it's none of that bull shit. It has to do with being smart, it has to do with thinking about the consequences your actions will cause.

I dove into things with my eyes closed and my legs open, but smart kids like you tested the water, and made sure you were safe. I was jealous of kids like you, I still am because even if you had somehow gotten yourself into my situation, you'd be smart enough to get yourself out. I am ignorant. And its the days where I rediscover this that are the hardest.

Sometimes I sit back and I think about all the great stuff I could have done, all the good things I could have been, a mother, a teacher, a care taker, hell even a nurse! Something that would make a positive impact. Something that helps more than harms. When I was a kit, I always wanted to be a… oh god, please don't laugh at me. When I was young I wanted to be a…a protector.

Don't ask me why, I have no idea…but maybe I do. Maybe it's because I like to do things that people like. Maybe its because it was a way to be dignified and able to help others. I never told anyone this, but its always been my dream to have a young kitten look up to their mum and say 'I want to be just like that queen. I want to be just like _Grizabella_.'.

I remember one time when I was still young, I was looking for something to do. So I did what most older kittens try at least once: kitten sitting. I was asked to kitten sit a queen kitten named Victoria. I only watched her for a few hours every week, but by the time I had to stop it felt like a million years.

That was something special to me. The bond one could have with a kitten, we connected on more of a personal level than most of my friends and I did. My favorite part of kit sitting was the control it brought me. I had the control to take this plain old kit and turn her into someone extraordinary.

How Vicky loved my visits! She liked other cats too, but we had something special. Everyone told me I had a gift, then when I grow up I could be raising prodigies and a bunch of other great stuff like that. I of course didn't see it that way. Once Vicky got older she wanted to play with other kits more than me, but we still had that bond.

That's a happy memory I have. I don't get those so much now. I get scared of happy. I think that for everything happy and good that happens, something sad and bad has to counter it. Thats when I get bad memories. Like the time when I gave Flicker all I had after my coming of age ceremony. Doing it was awful, it was gross and dirty and it left me with a bad taste in my mouth.

But I know why I did it. I did it for the same reason I did all that shit I used to do. I did it because it's what people want to hear about. It's the scandal and the inappropriateness of it that made it so popular. People wanted a good story so I gave it to them, and they ate it up.

Almost everyone my age admired me, I had bravery, I could do what none of them had dared. I was deemed untouchable, I was glamorous and I flaunted it. Do you ever see those girls in those human television shows walking in a room like they own the place, and everybody makes room for them because they are just that important? That was me, I was that girl.

Although while most everyone my age admired me, most everyone older than me mocked me, 'She must be messed up in the head, why else would she do that?' , and 'Maybe she's just stupid.' floated around the gossip of my elders frequently.

Truth is I wasn't messed up in the head. I had no excuses, the only reason I did what I did was because I was stupid. Plain and simple as that. Because to me it didn't matter if they were insults, or whole crowds moving aside for me in the hallway, attention was attention.

With that mentality in mind I continued on more dangerous methods of seeking the attention of my peers. Every time my story got old I would do something bigger, badder than before. It felt like a win-win, they had a new story on the glamour cat every few weeks, and I had all eyes pointed at me.

Looking back I shudder at that, it was the beginning of the end. A long hard fall that would leave me broke, lonely and at the bottom of the food chain in a fast pace city like London was. I sell my body to anyone with money, and I steal their booze and cigarettes.

I can't hold a job except prostitution, nobody will hire a slut like me except ugly toms. Being a prostitute is the only thing i'm good at, and it's always in demand. But now i'm getting older, I find new wrinkles and spots everyday.

I don't know what i'll do when I can't sell myself anymore. Beg? Nobody wants me, my own mother disowned me, and I can't blame her. And who wants to settle down with a screw up like me?

It's a tough life i've brought on myself. It stings when a young kit stares at me, knowing in their little minds that I am bad, they stare for as long as they can until their mama's pull them away. I don't blame them, who wants their kid looking at some reject like me? They want good kids, and I am a bad influence.

Thats all hard, but I think the worst part is when folks from the old days recognize me, when they can see what a nobody i've become…So trust me kit, you don't want to end up like me.

Where no one ever looks at you as anything but a sex object, a used up old toy. I had _years_ of good life ahead of me and I threw it all away when I was young, soiled it…spoiled it. And now i'm left with the broken remains of what could have been.

An empty shell that no one wants, you can't get away from that. It's like a stink that follows you around forever, constantly deferring people away. So do yourself a favor and don't fall into what I fell into. In fact, you should get away from me too. Save yourself from being what I am. Save yourself from being bad.

**So what did you think? Like it? Hate it? Somewhere in between? Drop me a review and let me know, I always PM back unless Fanfiction blocks me. **

**Also if you have any suggestions they would be greatly appreciated, leave me a name and an issue and I can write it! **

**I will be out of town for a while so excuse me if these updates take long but i'm adding two new chapters for you to keep you occupied**


	4. Munkustrap

**Hello and welcome to my story! First of all thanks to Meow Miss K for inspiring this chapter, and Lunaraquafy for being my beta! Also I will be gone for a week so no new stories :( but thats why i'm adding Grizaella and Munkustraps chapters today!**

If I had to describe my life in one word it would be mechanical. Everyday I wake up at dawn and go to the bathroom. When I come back Demeter is awake and about to go hunting for our breakfast, I greet her and kiss her good morning.

While she hunts I make an agenda for the day, which is _always_ the same. She comes back with two mice everyday, and gives me the bigger one. I eat it fast, kiss her goodbye, and go out to start my morning patrol.

Every day I patrol the Junkyard border and nothing is ever wrong. Then I check up with Alonzo to see how his night patrol went, nothing is ever wrong. By now the kittens are up and I check on them and chat a little with Jellylorum. Everyone is safe, everything is fine.

Next I go to Jennyanydots' den to see if anyone has been hurt today. Only minor injures. She offers me something to eat, I decline even though it wouldn't be any trouble and she always has good birds to eat. I go outside and catch a pheasant to eat for lunch.

As a eat I pace the junkyard going over my schedule again. It is always the same. After lunch I go on my afternoon patrol with Alonzo. Sometimes he doesn't come so he can stay home with Cassandra. He tells me that I should do the same someday for Demeter. I never do.

After my patrol I check in on the kittens and Jenny again, everyone is okay. Now I find Demeter chatting with Bombalaurina on the Great Tire. I say hello, Dem comes to my side updating me on the Junkyard news. Her sister rolls her eyes. I kiss Dem goodbye and leave them.

Demeter sighs at me, I know she wishes we were together more. She says goodbye and I go to our den for a nap. When I wake up she is there with supper waiting. I kiss her, thank her, and eat quickly so I can go on my evening patrol.

As usual nothing happens on the patrol. It is quiet. Alonzo has the next shift so I am alone. I am board and everything is in its place. All is well. Alonzo comes to take my place, I update him on my patrolling and I go home.

Demeter is already asleep. She left out a bit of warm cream for me. I drink it, soon I am sleepy. I go to our nest and kiss her on the head. Somedays she'll wake up and kiss me back before falling back to sleep. With her steady breathing as my guide I soon fall asleep too. Only to fallow the same schedule the next morning.

Its boring, and tiering, but at least everyone is safe. I know that I should give Dem the contact and mate she wants, and I know that I should skip patrols to be with her, and every once in a while I should take a vacation. I should do all those things, but I don't.

Because right now its quiet and safe, if boredom is the price to pay for safety, then what else can I do?

**How did I do? Any feed back? Write me a review and i'll message you back (unless Fanfiction won't let me) and i'll message you in my next chapter**


	5. Etcetera

**Cettie's chapter up! So after I came back from my vacation I had inbox overload with reviews, so before I continue I must thank: **_**Meow Miss K, Pink Schmetterling, Cocobutterrox, **_**and **_**eld mcm **_**for reviewing! **

**And of course my lovely beta **_**Lunaraquafy**_**! You guys make me smile!**

Everyone always sees me as the tom-crazed, excitable kitten. Wild, a bit rude, and if I'm not too much of one thing I'm too much of another.

It gets tiring having to be exited twenty-four seven. I like it because most of the time I feel exited, but it also kind of stinks because I'm expected to be happy all the time, and sometimes I don't feel that way at all.

I want to be like Coricopat and Tantomile, or like Victoria. They get to be really quiet all the time and no one ever thinks its weird.

Sometimes I wish I hadn't started this whole Tugger crazy thing, its getting a little annoying even for me! Every cat sees me as the tom crazed kitten, and I don't want that label hanging over my head all my life.

I ache to be like the other queen kittens who might have a small crush on Tugger, but not so much as cats think that he is their only person of interest. Those kits have toms who admire them.

I want people to see me like they see Jemima, not too loud, not too quiet, not too tom crazy, not too prudish. Sweet yet snarky, mature yet kitten like, pretty and petite. Perfect.

All the older cats think she is so adorable and all the tom-kits think she is pretty. I have trouble attracting anyone and she is like a magnet.

I disappoint myself. Why can't I act more like Jemima? Why can't I be perfect too? I know the answers.

First of all I'm too fat, I'm starting to look like Bustopher Jones. I could cut down a bit on my pheasant consumption. And my rat consumption, and grouse, and pigeon, and mouse. I could exercise more too. Lately I've been spending lots of time on my butt.

Next I'm too loud, I need to quiet down and be more reserved, if I wan't to be charming I mustn't talk over cats all the time.

I also need to stop being so snarky . Some of the things I say are witty, but I always go overboard and the humor vanishes. And then all the older cats think that I'm disrespectful.

I need to be more independent. Not having a tomfriend is not the end of the world, and if I'm not sufficient on my own how will any of the toms find me attractive?

Speaking of attraction I need to make myself more pretty. Groom my fur twice a day, and make sure I never have any gunk in my ears, nose or eyes. I must get my beauty rest to look awake, so no more late nights out. Never a hair out of place.

It will be very hard, but if that's what it takes to be perfect then thats what I need to do.

**So tell me what you though via review bellow, otherwise your kind of leaving me in the dark on how my writing is. **

**And remember I can see how many people are reading my story and I know if you don't review, so don't make me call my friend Munkustrap to monitor you! **

**If you leave me a review I will PM you back (so long as fan fiction lets me) and write your name on the A/N of my next chapter!**

**Also no new chapter until I get seven new reviews!**


	6. Electra

**First of all, thank you notes. Thanks to **_**Meow Miss K**_**, **_**Cocobutterrox,**_** and **_**eld mcm**_** for your continued support! And of course **_**Lunaraquafy **_**for being a wonderful beta reader! **

**So in this Chapter, Electra is talking to Etcetera, enjoy!**

I've always been a shoulder, somebody to lean on. I helped you up in your time of need. I motivated you, gave you the strength you were in desperate need of. I wouldn't back down.

But where are we now? We don't speak much, barely a 'Hello' on the great tyre.

Where did the friendship go? The laughs and jokes we made at the others. Now that we're growing apart I wonder if I greet you in front of your new 'cool' friends you will treat me in the same mistaken way we treated them.

Just remember me while you're gone. Don't you remember me? The safe place, refuge. I was home to you. When everyone else stuck up their noses, mine state down. I listened to what you had to say, and I never turned you away. I forgot about myself, and eventually so did you.

I have found my self again after the rejection you brought, and the harm you caused. It was unintentional, but that doesn't mean it stings any less.

Looking back on my ignorance…looking at you hurts. I gave you pity as easy a mother would a kitten, but now I see I am still a kitten myself. Abused and neglected. I was never able to care for someone all on my own.

Now I have fallen, but where is my shoulder to cry on? Where is my comfort, love, and support? Who is there to pity poor old me?

Not you, you were never there for me. And now you've gone off with your new friends making new trouble. I am left in the dust.

I feel old and tired, though on the outside I glow with youth. I will never get back those precious moments you took from me, and my scars are deep, but there is a chance for me.

I need some guidance. A friend, a hope, a spark, anything to help me cope with what you put me through. I need the truth cold and hard as it gets. I need to know that our friendship was broken from the start. And I need to accept it all.

I know this was meant to happen and I have learned a lesson taught with the cold dark experience it comes with.

I will not regret our time together, because you cannot spend your life wishing away at the past, but I can always hope that the future will be better.

And I can make sure that I won't screw someone over like you did me, I have learned from your mistakes. Next time I need somebody to support me I won't take and then leave. I will be there for them because I know what it feels like to be alone.

**How was that? Drop me a review below and tell me, otherwise your kind of leaving me in the dark about how that story went. Also if you review you will get your name posted on my next chapter and a PM from yours truly!**

**Make sure to let me know who you think should be next and a common theme for their monologue and I will do the best I can to publish it!**

**Have a great existence**


	7. Tantomile

**Hiya folks! Whats new in the world of you? Let me give a few shout-outs to **_**Cocobutterrox, Meow Miss K, eld mcm**_**, and of course **_**Lunaraquafy **_**for being my awesome beta!**

**This is Tantomile 'Talking' to the other Jellicles.**

Stop mocking me! I know that I'm different than you, I don't need your rude stares and not-so-discrete whispers to remind me. I know better than anyone in the entire Junkyard how different I am.

Everyday I find something new that separates us. Every word my brother sends to me telepathically, every aura I read, and every abnormal sense that I have reminds me. Your heads might be too high up in the clouds to notice this, but it hurts. Every word you whisper about me is like a slap to the face, and every nasty look is like a punch to the gut. Even though your silly words shouldn't hurt me they do. I know they're not very serious, but sometimes that makes it all the more believable.

In the mornings I wake up and think 'Maybe today will be better', and everyday I have my hopes crushed by the people who are supposed to love me. And the worst part is, that all this hate is for no goddamn reason.

Why can't we be friends? I have not caused you any harm, so why do you treat me this way? Is it just because I am physic? That's nothing to be afraid of. The worst I can do to you is assume your feelings, and that is something anyone can do if they take simple notes of posture, and facial expression.

But you are still cruel, and not to mention hypocrites. You call _me_ 'Strange' and 'Odd', but I don't know anyone else who would turn against someone who has done them no harm. Sometimes I almost talk to you guys and ask you why you do this, but I see no reason, every time I try to talk you shoot me down. Your not nice, and if you keep this up you will get nowhere in life, I want to tell you this, but you won't listen to an outcast like me. Who ever does.

The problem is that I'm fighting a losing battle, I'm outnumbered. You can counter every move I make, and I can't do anything about it.

The only person I can trust _not _to hurt me is my brother Coricopat, but I fear he is getting board of me. After all we do spend all day together. He says that he loves me, but a kin's word is always a biased one. Besides, there isn't much to love. I am a social outcast with no reason to live. I'm about ready to give up.

Who knows maybe I will end it someday, life in the Heavyside layer seems a lot better than life here. I was going to try to get picked by Old Deuteronomy, but I don't think he knows I exist. Why should he let me have a new life? Why am I so great?

The competition is already tough, so I think I might just end it myself. I don't want to come back to a world of these cats again anyway. I'd rather be alone in Heavyside, then here with these jerks.

Though, a part of me knows that isn't true. I long to be accepted by these cats, however jerky they may be. I wish for a best friend with whom I can console. A cat who will listen to me, and joke around. We could have inside jokes and sleepovers and we could hangout all the time.

Some of these cats aren't so bad. Jemima is nice, not to corrupted yet. So is Victoria. They would make good friend material. If we were friends maybe other cats wouldn't…oh, who am I kidding? Those queens are too perfect to be friends with me.

I am an insignificant speck of dirt, and they are ravishing mountains. Thats why cats don't like me. I am a weak link, puny and useless. I am different because I am psychic. Not to mention my timid personality makes me practically invisible. Except when they need someone to mock. I am a disease that no cat wants to catch, so I am quarantined.

**So how was it? Don't be shy, drop me a comment or question in the form of a review down below, go ahead, I dare you.**

**And remember, anyone who reviews gets a mention in my next chapter, a PM from me, and ice-cream! Just kidding about the ice-cream part :)**

**Also I am always looking for new idea's especially now for: Macavity, Victoria, and Misto!**


	8. Tumblebrutus

**Hello all! I wrote this chapter not really knowing who it was going to be about, so then I decided it should be about Tumble because he's a pretty neutral kitten. Now for the traditional thanking. A special thanks to **_**Pink Schmerrerling, eld mcm, **_**and **_**Cocobutterrox **_**for reviewing. And thanks to **_**Lunaraquafy **_**for being my wonderful beta!**

Mom and Dad were fighting again last night. What could they possibly be fighting about this time?They're always so loud when they argue, it keeps me awake at night. When they fight about me I wonder if it is my fault, I see so many opportunities to be a good kitten, and I try to be good, but it's really hard to be good all the time. When they fight about other things I still feel bad. It makes me really sad when they are mad. I want us all to be happy like the other families.

They argue so often that I wonder if one day they will run out of things to fight about. I would make that day a national holiday for everybody to celebrate. Every cat would be happy. I would call that day 'Happy Day'. I know what will happen on that day.

I will wake up to the smell of fresh mouse and the sound of giggling. When I get up, I will see my mommy and daddy and they will hug me and kiss me good morning. Mommy will give me a whole mouse to myself and it will still be warm from when it was alive. Daddy and mommy will kiss each other nicely and we will eat together as a family. We eat slow, savoring the flavor of the rodent.

When our bellies are full we will go outside for a nice walk in the sunshine. It will be warm and breezy. When we reach the end of the junkyard we will all lay down on a rare patch of grass and watch the clouds go by. We will tell each other the pictures we see in the sky. Daddy will tell us a funny joke and we will all laugh. We will lay there for hours.

My tummy will growl and we will start on the way home. On the way daddy will catch us a rabbit to eat. When we get home we eat, and laugh while we tell jokes. I will feel sleepy and mommy will tell me its nap time. She will carry me to my nest and cuddle with me until I fall asleep. Then she and daddy will hug and talk nicely.

When I wake up mommy and daddy will say they have a surprise for me. They take me to a park where human kittens will pet me and feed me fishy snacks. When they leave we lay in the sun on the cool grass. Daddy will tell me about how he and his friends used to climb trees. He will teach me how to climb really well, and even when I fall mommy will kiss my boo-boos and make them good again. Mommy, daddy and I will have a tickle fight, and they will let me win.

We go back to the den and rest for awhile. Daddy will leave for a few minutes and come back with a blue jay for dinner. After we eat, mommy will make me a crown with the feathers and call me a king. I will command them to give me kisses, and they do. Daddy will tell me what a good king I am. Mommy says that I am a good kitten.

When I am done ruling the house, we go outside to watch the sunset. I say that it is beautiful, daddy says mommy is beautiful. When the sun is gone, and we can see the stars clearly, daddy teaches me about constellations. I will see my first shooting star. I will yawn, and mommy will say that its time for bed mister. I will protest, but then I yawn some more. Mommy will carry me to my nest.

Daddy will come in and tell me a pirate story, it will have a try happy ending. Mommy will sing me a lullaby and my eyes will get very sleepy. They will kiss me goodnight. I will fall asleep and dream of pirates, Neverland, and happy things.

It all seems so real. Almost too real.

But nothing, not the screaming, not the yelling, or the arguing, or the sound of things breaking, will stop me from waiting for my Happy Day.

**So how was it? Yay or nay? Drop me a review and tell me. I'll be sure to get back to you in a PM and a mention in my next chapter!**

**Who else should get a monologue? Have any ideas for a cat? Don't just sit there, tell me for everlasting cats sake!**

**I thought this chapter was a bit like Family Portrait by P!nk, what do you think**


	9. Jemima

**Okay lots of requests for this one. I did my best, hope you like it, and if you don't…whatever, I write for myself! Thank you time! A very special thanks to **_**eld mcm**_**, and **_**Cocobutterrox **_**for being loyal reviewers, and as always thanks to **_**Lunaraquafy **_**for being an awesome beta! I really hope you like this.**

**Jemima talking to anyone, possibly herself.**

It's not the moon that i'm always so focused on. I often look at the moon to send my thoughts, and think about my secrete name, it's the name I had in my past life. Not many cats know this, but I am one of the chosen few who got to come back to a different Jellicle life.

My old life was hard, due to a kitten hood illness I was deaf. Life around me was just movements and I had to work ten times as hard as any other cat to comprehend a single sentence. I could not speak or sing and there was no way I could keep up with my friends in anything. I would often use the only sense I had at my disposal: sight. I would stare at a given point for minutes on end before someone snapped me out of it. I lived years like that until I was chosen by old Deutureonomy.

With no way of communicating with my fellow Jellicles I had few friends, and even fewer people who understood me, both literally and not. There was one cat though, he's gone now, but Gus the theater cat was a true friend. When I came back to the Jellicles I didn't even have to tell him who I really was, he knew right off the bat.

Back when I was deaf, he understood me, hard of hearing himself, he knew could easily decipher what my paw motions meant. He soon learned my motions and we could have full fledged conversations. For the first time I could have a conversation, I could communicate, I was heard. But thats not all I could do, I learned to listen. I could watch Gus tell stories for ages.

My favorite is the one about a lonely man who longs for a child. He carves a kitten out of wood and that night a beautiful fairy comes down from a star and makes the wooden kitten come to life. The man is very happy, but the wooden kit wishes he was a real kitten like his friends. His stories were all about adventures. Gus would make new ones every time he told the story. In the end the wood kitten turns into a real cat just like he always wanted.

In my dreams Gus would be that man and I would be the kitten and in the end we would live happily ever after. I loved those dreams. The strange thing is that because at one point in my life I could hear, I could also hear voices in my dreams. I could hear the deep voices of the toms, the delicate voices of the queens, and the soft mewls of the kittens. I could hear so many nice things.

Now that I can actually hear, I know that not everything is nice to hear. People are always talking about others behind their backs. Usually about something they can't control or that was settled a long time ago. It's a little weird when you hear two friends talk about each other badly. I try to stay away from all of that. I know how it feels to have people talk about you.

Sometimes when I was with Gus people would come up and say things and Gus wouldn't translate them for me. He would translate almost anything for me, but when people say bad things he would pretend like nothing happened. Even though I didn't know what they were saying I knew they were not good things. My mind would sometimes be too filled with ideas of what they might be saying that I couldn't sleep at night.

That's why I was so quick to accept Grizabella, I know how it all feels. And I knew that if I were to accept her then everyone else would follow. Not to toot my own horn or anything, but these cats love me. I'm good at practically everything. I'm good at singing, dancing, speaking, and learning. I am obedient, kind, and respectful. It comes with having already lived a life. I know what everybody wants and I can use that to my advantage.

For example, if Jennyanydots wants us kittens to do something I'll do it because I know that whatever she wants us to do is for our own good, then the rest of the kittens will follow my lead. I can counsel my friends because I've lived through it already. And if a cat like Grizabella comes along then I can shift every cats mind set so that thoughts of hatred are tuned into thought of forgiveness and happiness.

I only use my abilities for good. If someone needs help I'm there to assist. When some cat is feeling down I'm there to help them up again. I want cats to be happy, and I don't want anyone to feel as down as I did.

When I look at the moon, all these thoughts are channeled into a message for Gus, so he can see how much I have grown, and how I am using my hearing, and knowledge for good. I got my second chance, and my only hope is to help someone get theirs too.

_In loving memory of Gus The Theater Cat._

**So how was that? I've gotten lots of requests for this one, did I do a good job? Tell me in a review!**

**Have you every wanted to read a monologue about a Jellicle cat, but didn't know how? Its as easy as one, two, three! FIrst you click review, second you write about how much you loved my story and how you would like to hear one about _ who struggles with/thinks about/feels _. Thirdly you press Review. Simple as that!**

**P.S. The story was Pinocchio**


	10. Jellylorum

**Hello all! How are you? Chapter 10 is up! And now the thanking part of the A/N! A very special thanks to: **_** , Pink Schmetterling, Cocobutterrox, eld mcm, **_**and as always a enormus thanks to my beta **_**Lunaraquafy**_**! This is Jellylorum's rant, and don't worry some humor chapters are coming this way!**

**Basically Jelly ranting to herself about the world and her problems.**

This isn't fair! That pollicle loving Grizabella is a thieving asshole. She didn't deserve to go to the Heaviside Layer and get reincarnated. That spot should have gone to Gus. He lived a long and hard life, and yet he was so humble. She lived a petty short life, full of drama that could have been prevented. Gus preformed in professional theater, he played deep moving parts. All that bitch did was ruin lives and run.

Why is everybody so accepting of her, after all she left us. She gave us no reason to allow her back except that she was _sorry. _Can you believe it, a single word is not going to undo what she did. How could she even think that it would? I hope she knows how low she is.

She did something horrible, something inexcusable. I don't even know why she is still living. If I were her I would probably kill myself. Living with the guilt of what I had done...

She got pregnant with some bastard rouge's kitten, and expected us to be okay with it. Then to make matters worse, after she gave birth, she left. Just left! No telling anyone, no note, she just left her kitten on my door and left. She expected us to take care of it! Can you believe that? And it's not like she was raped, the pregnancy was perfectly preventable!

That horrible queen had a lovely kitten, a beautiful living creature that she just gave up. A kitten is a miracle, it's a gift from Heaviside above. She treated it like it was some inanimate object. Like it had no potential or future in front of it.

After she left I took in the poor kit, and raised him as my own. After all my little Asparagus Jr. hadn't hurt anyone, it was that twisted witch. I do not regret taken in Asparagus or Gussy as I like to call him, even though Grizabella was his mother, they looked nothing alike, and he certainly didn't act like her. I brought him up to be a respectable gentle tom with good nature.

He has no memory of Grizabella, and even if I do tell him I'm sure he wouldn't care, I'm his mummy and I have been since the day she left. She doesn't even remember the little dear. I suppose thats a good thing, less drama for Gussy. Now that he's a full grown cat he can look for her, but I doubt he will. He has all he could ever want right here with me.

When Grizabella showed up asking for forgiveness I knew that I needed to protect the kittens. If they saw her they might get ideas, after all their little minds are so impressionable, if they saw how the witch lived they could be tempted. I also told Munkustap to keep everyone away from her, she is bad. Thank the Everlasting Cat, she left.

When Gus's song came up I went with him to talk him up a bit, and increase his chance of being chosen. Although I was positive he had this one paws down. He had lived the longest (save Old Deuteronomy). When his song was over I was so sure he would get into Heaviside. I'll bet he would have to if it wasn't for that feral beast.

Some days I think that I'm too hard on her, but then I remember Gus. Poor, disabled, palsy ridden Gus. His last few years of life were so difficult that he could barely manage to go out and meet up with his acting buddies at the local pubs. He was so sick.

During his final hours of life Gus told me, "This is just part of the role I was meant to play.". A part of me wants to believe that, but I knew how much he wanted to be reborn. He would go on for hours on end about the things he would do with a young body again, the difference he could make in the world. With youth on his side people would _listen_ to him.

This ball was his last chance, and now he is gone. There is no more Gus the theater cat and there never will be again. He is lost forever. I want him back, I miss him so much. Gus was like a father to me, so kind and admirable. He died just two days after the ball, he knew that his last chance was gone, he was ready for it. I couldn't tell if he was complacent about dying or not.

What I hate most about this whole ordeal is that no one but Gussy and I are even phased by it. One of the greatest cats in the Junkyard is gone and no cat gives a damn! I hope they appreciated his wisdom and humility while it lasted, because ladies and gentle tom, Gus the theater cat has taken his final bows.

**Well that was that! How did you like it? If you send me a review I can get back to you with a PM ASAP, hehe so many capitals! Plus you get a mention in my next chapter!**

**Have a great idea for future chapters? Tell me in a review or a PM!**

**Enjoy your life!**


	11. Mistoffelees

**Wow it's been a long while science I've updated! This chapter was originally going to be Pouncival, but there was some technical difficulties. A very special thanks to **_**eld mcm **_**and**_** Cocobutterrox **_**for reviewing, and as always thanks to **_**Lunaraquafy **_**for beta reading!**

**This is Misto talking to anyone who will listen!**

When I was first asked about my magic I was a little confused, but happy to do it. No one, but Munkustrap had ever asked me about it before and I was happy to share my story. But if I am going to do that, I must start at the beginning.

First of all I have physical magic, It is very similar to parlor tricks and magicians work. Physical magic is the type of magic used to move things. It is not to be confused with mental magic, that's like what Coricopat and Tantomile do, that stuff includes telepathy and aura reading. I inherited my magic from my father Macavity, my sister Victoria did not.

I have known about my magic for as long as I can remember. It was obvious from the moment I was born. It ran in my fathers family, both he and his dad had had it. So it wasn't surprising that I had it too. You see magic is a genetic trait, and usually one kitten per litter has powers.

Anyways, from the moment I started showing control over my powers, information about practicing magic safely was drilled into my head. I read books, talked to Old Dueteronomy and started to learn more about my magic. When I was younger doing magic tricks was great fun. I got to preform them for all the other kits and they would admire me. I would get asked lots of questions, and I knew the answers to most of them. And the best part was putting on my magic shows for the whole tribe, I was the star of the kittens.

Now going magic isn't as much fun, and I prefer to practice so I don't have to be critiqued by the others. My magic had grown very strong and some cats see it as a threat. Now I mostly preform parlor tricks, and the questions get boring after awhile. I have magic shows, but not as often. And I always have to be cautious so that I don't worry the other cats.

When I was a young tom I was popular. Everybody wanted me to preform tricks for them and answer their questions and teach them magic. I used to love the attention, but now I prefer a more reserved lifestyle. Though I will still do small things for the kittens when they ask, I like making them smile. But sometimes my magic can be a hassle, things will not always be easy for me. I was contemplating this a few nights ago.

As I sat in my den I began to think. I was going to have this problem all my life, my magic may be loved by some, but now that I was getting more powerful cats were afraid of me. Everyone thinks that I will turn out like Macavity, but I am good. This is going to be a huge issue and I can't get out of it. I felt trapped by my disease, because even though sometimes it doesn't feel like it I am. After coming to this conclusion I cried for a long time. I didn't know anyone else who had what I had, there was nobody to turn to, I felt alone.

Now I know that isn't true, but that is how I felt. I know that there are people like me and that I can earn everybody's trust. I know that I should see my magic as a challenge to conquer and I shouldn't let it conquer me. But that is how I felt. I don't always feel like that. Some of the things that my magic brings me are good, like the kittens admiration and my friends Coricopat and Tantomile.

So in the end I am content with my my magic, because no matter what happens or how I'm feeling it will always be there. An inside part of me that will never change even when the outside does. It will forever be _my _ magic.

**Did you all like it? I may never know, but wait! If you leave me a review I will know!**

**Got any clue who I should do next? PM me or give me a review saying who and what it should be about!**

**Thank you all**


	12. Victoria

**Boo! Hello my lovely readers! Another chapter posted. I actually wrote this at school, so if it sounds funny know that it is my school brain and not my home brain! A very special thanks to all of you including: **_**Meow Miss K, Jemidancer2011**_**, **_**eld mcm**_**, **_**Cocobutterrox**_**, and of course to my lovely beta **_**Lunaraquafy**_**! I hope you guys like it!**

**This is Vicky ranting!**

Well now I've done it. In an attempt to perform a complicated ballet move, I severely injured my hind leg. I knew I should have stretched longer, I just felt…invincible, like nothing could ever go wrong. And now I'm in deep, Jenny says that I'm lucky to walk without a limp again, much less dance.

What am I going to do with my life? Dancing is my everything, without dancing I am incomplete. All my hard work will be thrown away. So much time has been wasted, and for what? So I could learn a new move. How could I be so foolish?

I guess I wanted to do something better, something that no other cat in the Junkyard could do. I wanted to prove that I was better than them. Ha! Look who is so high and mighty now. All curled up in her nest wasting away the days.

I suppose I should find something to occupy myself with now that my dancing is over. But what is there to do? Surely there is something, what did I do before dance? I guess I would play with the other kittens, but now that's out of the question. They all have lives of their own now.

I remember taking lessons from Jenny, she tried teaching me to crochet, but I was horrible at it. And I was far too young to join her boy scouts, not to mention I'm a queen. She tried to teach me how to sing, that didn't work either.

Damn this stupid leg! If it weren't for this dumb leg I could be dancing right now! Why me, why must I suffer this horrible fate? I was a beautiful dancer, probably the best in the tribe, and now I'm as useless as a newborn kit.

It's a terrible feeling that I have. One minute I am standing tall and gracefully, and the next I'm on the ground stripped of my mobility. Things that were once easy to me propose a challenge that is almost impossible.

I am crippled and it's my own fault, if only I had taken more time to stretch or worked out my legs more I wouldn't be in this situation. I would give anything to dance again, I want to preform pirouettes and pliés, and I want my body to become my instrument again.

There was a time when I didn't know how to dance; in fact I was the worst in the entire tribe. I was sloppy and anything but graceful, but I knew from the start that I wanted to dance. So I trained long and hard for hours each day.

I would wake up and go for a run to warm up my muscles. Then I would stretch for a while before I began my dancing. I didn't have anyone to teach me, but I knew everything that I wanted to learn and what it looked like so I taught myself.

I taught myself to count one, two, three, four, and stay sharp in my movements. I trained in leaps, jumps and turns. Stretched for hours to gain my exceptional flexibility, and worked hard to become a perfect ballerina.

For years, day in and day out I would work long and hard to become flawless. I know every single trick in the book and can execute it without flaw. I was perfection. The Everlasting Cat must not have liked that very much, because not I am here lying in my nest wasting the days away, and wallowing in self-pity.

Dancing was my identity. Before dance I was a nameless kit who mindlessly followed Tugger and was well behaved most of the time. But then I got my talent, something to separate myself from the others, I was the kitten who danced. I became the graceful one, with poise and determination.

Now I will be looked upon as the fallen one, who never stood back up.

**Sorry for doing that to ya Vicky, but I needed a chapter 12. Anyhow, on with the usual babbling! I know that I'm not always posting what people request, but I have a stock pile of chapters ready so I can't always put the requested ones first BUT! I do write the ideas down in my 'I need to write this' pile.**

**With that being said, shoot me a review and tell me if you like it or an idea you might have!**

**Have a wonderful day, knowing that Tugger will always be very sexy!**


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